I'm slowly being to realise how truly insensitive I am. Just today (the last day of internship), my manager was saying how everyone is stabbing him with insults today.
Case in point- when we were suddenly talking about siblings during lunch
Jojo: (at the manager) so.. let me guess if you have siblings. You look like you won't be the 最老的 (aka oldest in eng, a more explicit term for old).
Manager K: 为什么用老这个字。 不是'最大' 吗 (translation) asking me why I didn't use the term 'eldest' but 'old') 昨天捅我几刀, 今天又捅 worh。。(translation: whining at how i keep throwing daggers of insults at him, attacking his age haha)
Haha manager K continued to get teased for the rest of the day. Supervisor J was talking about his collection of shoes and said that K probably is not dressing as nice as he would be because he doesn't had a girlfriend. So manager K was like "今天重伤 worh 一直被你们砍" hahahaha I wish all guys takes insults/teases as well as he does. It's so refreshing!
Back to my reflection- I have such an unfiltered brain and stinky mouth. How did calling people 'not old', turn into an insult T.T It's actually kind of difficult to hold my horses and stop before my habitually-bad mouth shoots off badly-phrased, nasty-sounding comments.
I am still figuring out how to manage the balance of being responsive, quick witted and active during a conversation, while taking time to phrase things nicely. Haiz.. I wish a mouthwash can solve all of this
Fighting a hard battle with my own weakness,
Jojo
P.s During in period of self-battle, I totally need my very own trusty and loyal dog, the Xiao Tian Quan (啸天犬 - “Howling Celestial Dog”).. every few days i would look to my bed and wished a dog was hanging it tongue out at me. None of my siblings seems to take me seriously about how I want a dog when I'm signaling so strongly to them. Damn:/ when I asked my mum if she would let me trade a 21st birthday party for a dog, she said and implied "no, ur dog will die. I don't want to take care of the aftermath" =.= what ...whyyyyy
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